Parashat Nitzavim
Elul 21, 5772 ~ September 15, 2012
by Danielle Elkins
My husband has always asked me, “How does a girl
from South Carolina with your background end up here?” The “Here” is always
meant as a positive place. The answer I always give him is “Hashem”, and as a Reform
Jew, I used the word G‐d. Today, I’m so happy to know the concept, Hashem,
because it expresses the compassion of G‐d, which is what I feel Hashem has
given me on my journey toward observant Judaism.
This week’s parsha, Nitzavim, means “standing”,
and after studying this parsha I understand how I am still standing. Moshe
begins the his last speech on earth describing those standing before Hashem on
this day to renew the Covenant, and like at Mount Sinai it explains it is not
just those living at that time, but the future souls to come.
“Not with you alone do I seal this covenant and
this imprecation, but with whoever is here, standing with us today before
Hashem, our G‐d, and with whoever is not here with us today.” (29:13)
In my opinion, this is allowing for the
individual soul to witness and know in his heart the truth, no matter how far
the life of exile and persecution takes him. Hashem is arming each individual
soul with the ability to know the truth.
The parsha then goes on to describe how we will
stray and be exiled, but it is not the focus, like past parshiot. The emphasis
and the beauty are on how we will return to Hashem, no matter how far away we
have drifted.
“If your dispersed will be at the ends of heaven,
from there Hashem, your G‐d, will gather you in and from there he will take you.”
(30:4)
Rashi explains beautifully that the return of the
exiles “will come about with so much difficulty as if He Himself must actually
hold each and every person with His hands to take Him from His place in the
exile.”
Just before possuk 2: “And you will return all
the way to G‐d, your G‐d” which Rav Samson Raphael Hirsch explains is not a
partial return. He writes, “You will not stop halfway; your return will be so
complete that you will come back all the way to G‐d.”
In just the past five years, my life and my
family’s life have had so many forks or you could even say stopping points on
our path to observant Judaism, but with each challenge or obstacle we were
propelled forward toward observance. Something beyond logic moved us forward.
As a child, I knew I was Jewish. With the last
name Goldstein, the Christian world that surrounded me knew it too, so my whole
life was a target for good meaning Christians trying to save my soul. The first
time I was confronted with this idea was when the Baptist minister’s family moved
next door. I was only five. Unfortunately or maybe fortunately, I could not
tell them what being a Jew meant. The ten‐year old daughter of the minister
took it upon herself to save my soul from the fires of hell, and she did save
me. By making me play a game walking through the fires of hell by day with the
crucifix on the wall, it brought the fires of hell to life in my nightmares. I
would wake screaming from what seemed real to my young imaginative mind, but I
was given the gift of knowing my heart and soul. My soul was Jewish. I had no
logical explanation; I just knew it was who I was, if it meant walking through the
fires of hell for all eternity, that was my fate. That little girl saved me
from ever doubting who I was, no matter what individual or authority questioned
the correctness or validity of my identity.
Moshe explains how I could know without specific
education. “For this commandment that I command you today‐it is not hidden from
you and it is not distant. (30:11) “Rather the matter is very near to you‐in
your mouth and in your heart‐perform it.” (30:14) The sages teach in Niddah 30b
that the fetus is taught the Torah, but forgets it at birth. Rabbi Joseph
Soloveitchik writes that this can allow a person an innate familiarity with
Torah even without formal education.
Hashem has given us the tools to return, but we
must take an active role. For me, the best expression of this is Seek your G‐d
and you shall live, which is found in numerous ways throughout the Tanakh. It
seems so simple but “Seek” is not a passive word. To truly seek you must use every
aspect of your mind, heart, soul, and body. Only by doing this can you find the
strength to choose “the life and the good”, over “the death and the evil.” To
Seek your G‐d is personal and for every person this journey is different, but
hopefully in the end we will “SEE” which is the first word in the last
paragraph of this Parsha.
It seems perfect that the mnemonic (the numerical
value which correlates to a word) for this Parsha means “His Heart”.
