Michal Kohane
Parsha Vayeirah
Jane: Honey, what is that wooden sled still doing here? Jakie
almost broke his head tripping over it when we walked into the garage! You know
how much I hate it. I told you to throw it away!!
Joe: Honey, this is my favorite sled! You know how much it
means to me. With this very sled my high school sweetheart and I won the
foreign teens championship in Norway thirty years ago during my year abroad!
You cant possibly ask me to…
G-d: Joe! Forget that old sled. Just do whatever Jane says...
Among its many amazing stories, from Abraham hosting the
messengers and arguing with G-d for Sodom and Gamora, to the miraculous birth
of Isaac and the mesmerizing story of the Binding, we get a one verse glimpse
into what must be the most famous domestic dispute. Sarah tells Abraham to kick
Hagar and Yishma’el out, and while we do not hear Abraham’s response, we can
guess it, for had he quickly agreed (as he did back in chapter 15 when Sarah
first offered him Hagar), there would have been no need for G-d Himself to
intervene.
Last week, in Parashat Lech-Lecha (Genesis 15:1-16), Sarah
(then still Sarai) suggested that Abraham (Abram) take Hagar to have a child.
After all, G-d promised him an offspring, but maybe not through her? They have
been in the land now, after returning from Egypt, for ten years. Surely if G-d
wanted them to have children together, it would have happened by now. Maybe
it’s just Sarah who is stalling G-d’s plan? As they have aged, she might have
become more and more worried.
Hagar becomes pregnant, but rather than remembering she was
given to Abraham so Sarah can be “built” and have continuity through her
(15:2), she treats her mistress lightly. She continues to be known as Sarah’s “shifcha”
(maidservant) but feels herself to be Abraham’s wife. Sarah approaches Abraham
and asks for his help in the matter: “May Hashem judge between me and you”. His
response is, “do to her as you wish”.
Sarah “tortures” her (vate’aneha”)
and Hagar runs away. The angel that finds her also calls her “Hagar the
maidservant of Sarai” (15:8) and instructs her to go back. Rabbi Hirsch notes the
order of the angel’s words: “go back and work it out”, he says (loosely this is
how Hirsch explains “hit’ani”) and Hagar doesn’t move. Only when he
says, “behold you’re pregnant with a son…” (15:11) she agrees to go back.
In this week’s Torah portion, Isaac is born and Sarah
observes with great distress the interactions between her son, Isaac and that
son, Yishma’el. She doesn’t just tell
Abraham to send Hagar and Yishma’el away but uses the verb “garesh”,
same root used for gerushin, divorce. The text tells us that Abraham
felt very badly for his son, but G-d says, “don’t feel bad for the boy and
for your maidservant”, which might be the first time that someone actually notes
the special bond that developed between Abraham and Hagar. For a brief moment,
it seems that G-d “understands” Abraham’s feelings. It is important to note
that up until this point, none of our key Biblical heroes had a second wife so
perhaps no one knew how complicated the theory can get in real life. Still, in
spite of the brief compassion, G-d tells him: “Listen to Sarah’s voice”. Rashi
notes that this comes to show that Abraham was secondary to Sarah in prophesy.
Rabbi Hirsch notes that the voice is likened to the soul and that G-d
instructed Abraham to be tuned with Sarah’s spiritual knowledge. In a way,
Abraham was the transistor but Sarah was the antenna. In fact, G-d never talks to Abraham without
Sarah being an active part of his life!
But there is also irony in this section, expressed by the
choice of roots: first, it is Yishma’el who is the one “metzachek” (same
root as Yitzchak, from to laugh) and Sarah is the one about whom it is said, “shma
bekola” (same root as Yishma’el, from to hear, listen).
I admit: There was a time when I was almost jealous of
Sarah. Wouldn’t you like it if G-d showed up at your home too when you’re about
to lose an argument, telling everybody to listen to you and do as you say?!
But then it dawned on me how terrible it must have felt for
Sarah not to be heard by the person who was her nearest and dearest to her,
especially when it came to the most critical issue in their life; to be so unheard,
that G-d Himself had to intervene. Having such a powerful ally might shed light
not only her great spirituality but also on the grave state on their
relationship at that moment.
But in spite of the pain and him not fully understanding,
Abraham complies. He gets up early, packs a lunch and saddles his donkey. By
doing so, perhaps he gives Sarah what is still the greatest gift any person can
give another human being: the gift of listening.
No comments:
Post a Comment